Terluka tapi cinta

Aku dah cuba explain, aku dah cuba usaha, aku dah pujuk, aku dah nangis, aku dah sakit. Tapi dia masih tak faham. Aku cuma mangsa keadaan. Aku pergi buat sementara demi masa depan kita berdua. Dalam pemergian aku, aku tahu hati dia terluka, sama juga dengan aku. Bezanya, dia ada rakan yang memujuk dan menemani dan aku takde sesiapa. Malangnya bagi aku, rakan dia salah faham terhadap aku. Aku disalah ertikan dengan meninggalkan dia. Tak pernah aku tinggalkan dia, tak pernah aku berniat nak sakiti dia. Aku terpaksa pergi buat sementara demi masa depan kami berdua. Diajarnya si dia dengan kekentalan dan kekerasan hati. Sedihnya aku bila segalanya sudah habis dan boleh menyambutnya semula, dia berubah menjadi insan yang lain. Dia cuba nak menghalau aku dengan makian dan meninggalkan aku. Betapa terlukanya hati aku, betapa sakitnya hati aku tetapi ada yang menasihati aku agar usaha, bersabar dan cuba mengembalikannya semula. Aku cuba dan aku cuba. Dalam percubaan tu, dah banyak tangisan dan titisan air mata yang aku keluarkan. Tapi aku tetap takkan mengalah. Orang yang sayang aku dengan seluruh hatinya berhak diperjuangkan walaupun hati aku terluka. Dan sehingga kini aku masih mencuba, menempa hatinya, menempa dirinya walaupun dalam proses tu aku banyak kali sakit dan kecewa. Aku akan terus mencuba. Sayang aku pada dia takkan berubah dan tak pernah berubah. Sekarang aku ada cara tersendiri menahan kesakitan hati, dengan mencari kesakitan yang lebih dalam agar kesakitan hati ni lama kelamaan akan menjadi tidak seberapa. Namun aku masih mencari dan aku masih mencuba memujuk dan mengubat luka di hati si dia. Maafkan aku sayangku, cinta hatiku. Engkau memberi aku semangat, keberanian, kekentalan jiwa untuk aku terus berusaha. Terima kasih Nur Iman Amni. I love you so much and i miss you so badly.

Hope

Well i think this is the only place where i could post privately without anyone knowing about it. Well. Yesterday i just finished my exam. Alhamdulillah everything was doing very well. But then during those dreaded days, something happened and my heart was not at ease. I had a hunch to look over my darling's twitter and saw him tweeting with this one guy Chino i guess. Well this guy has been attracting a lot of my attention really. He has been tweeting with my girl until one day i suddenly argued with my baby iman about this. He haven't appeared too often like before i did. Maybe she has been contacting him personally so she wouldn't hurt my feelings. Well then after we argued, she changed a lot. She doesn't really care about me anymore, she doesn't say that she loves me anymore. Maybe because she don't. She doesn't want me to be with her 24/7 like she used to. I'm so devastated with her actions. I'm sad. I cried for 4 nights up till yesterday. Well. There's not much that i could do but trying to bring the old Nur Iman Amni back. The caring, loving, and heart-warming person. I love her too much to let her be like this. This is not her. She is never like this and she never was. I love you Nur Iman Amni Binti Aminuddin. I jist want to be with you. I crave for your loce and care. I need it. I really do need it. It's what have been kept me going. Giving me a stronger purpose to live and succeed. Please. Come back to me. I believe that we can do everything if we're together. I know that there's a hope for us. I know there is you and me forever.

Sincerely,
Your true love
Your another half
Your prince
Your saviour

Hello

Hello my dear Nur Iman Amni. It has been a long time since i saw you. I miss you so much. Life was better when you were with me back when we're in PASUM.

I know that you're continuing your degree in Uitm Shah Alam. You take care of yourself okay. You tell me if you found you're eye candy. I am jealous, very very jealous when you said that.

I guess i deserve it since i hurt me so much back in the past. Knowing you was the second best thing, and being with you was the best. I know that some part of your heart want vengeance and revenge but you're not making it obvious.

But honestly I'm okay, cus i know the pain that i bear cannot be compared to yours when ypu were with me. That's all from me.

P/S: I love you and your instajacking.

Sincerely
Danish

DaIm

I know that i am at fault and i don't deny it. My mistakes has brought us to the state that we are now. We're both tired but i ain't ready to give up. Especially to a girl like you. The one that made me happy and made me smile.

The memories i had with was brief but one of the best. Looking at you everyday, seeing you smile. Eventhough you look tired and beat up sometimes, i still thought you look pretty up till now with your soggy eyes because of studying late at night.

Every second, i always think about you. Never have i wanted for us to be in this state. I regret my decisions. Trust me i really do. I love you too much to forget, love you too much to let go, love you too much to let you be alone.

My dearest Nur Iman Amni Binti Aminuddin. I like you, I love you, I need you, I want you to be with me forever. I'm asking for you to stay with me through the hardest condition and the easiest. I ask you to love me and i want to love you both when we're at our lowest or when we're at our best.

I love you my dear

Sincerely
Danish

Sayang...

I know I've been the worst person in ur life. But do know this, you've been the best one for me. I know that lots of my actions have caused you to become like this. I don't mind because it's my fault anyway.

This ring that you gave me, I'll hold it for as long as i live to mark my love for you eventhough we're not together anymore. I'll hold on to this ring like how i hold my mother and father, with love and care.

Thank you for your concern to me and believe me, I've always been concerned bout you. No one knows how i cared for you. Only God knows.

It has come to a close

Terlalu banyak perkara yang berlaku semasa aku berada di PASUM. Setiap perkara akan aku ambilnya sebagai kenangan dan sebahagiannya aku ambil sebagai pengajaran. Kenangan pahit manis yang aku lalui di sini membuatkan aku kenal erti kehidupan, membuatkan aku kenal cara untuk membezakan antara kawan dan lawan, membuat aku tahu apa itu kasih sayang kawan dan kekasih.

Aku sedang menjalani hari-hari terakhir di PASUM ini dan dalam kegembiraan aku untuk meninggalkan neraka duniaku ini, aku tetap akan bersedih untuk berjauhan dengan orang-orang yang aku sayangi. Ashraf aka Achup, Sam, How, Jonet, Khai, Linggam, Yeop, Azu, Ishak, Meg, Coin dan ramai lagilah. Merekalah yang menceriakan hari-hari aku sepanjang aku di sini. Gelak tawa diorang tidak pernah lekang dari tingkat 6 ni. Orang kata tingkat 6 ni setan, tapi tak, inilah salah satu bahagian syurga di PASUM ni. Aku juga takkan lupa dengan kekasih hatiku Nur Iman Amni.... Sejujurnya aku sayangkan kau... Tak pernah sesaat pun aku terfikir tentang benci pada kau... Tidak mengapalah, hati manusia lain-lain. Hanya Allah yang tahu

Tak lupa juga pada budak group aku yang paling aku sayangi Anzar, Andy, Aufa, Azim, Haikal, Cepex, Luqman dan yang lain. Korang antara orang-orang yang paling awal aku kenal. Janganlah lupakan aku dan kelak kita akan berjumpa lagi di masa hadapan menceritakan tentang kejayaan masing-masing dalam hidup.

Selepas ni aku akan sambung diploma dan aku doakan yang terbaik untuk korang yang hendak masuk ke alam degree. Aku akan bermula semula dari 0 dan cuba menggapai apa yang aku mahukan. Kepada yang senasib denganku, jangan berputus asa. Sesungguhnya Allah takkan merubah nasib seseorang itu, sehingga dia merubah dirinya sendiri.

Exams

Well hello. Goo evening people. so pada malam yang tenang lagi tak menyenangkan bagi aku and pelajar PASUM sebab esok kami akan mula menempuh peperiksaan final untuk semester 1.

Woahhh.. rasa macam semalam je masuk UM ni. and now dah nak final. to be truthful. I am not ready!! Aku tak bersedia!! Macam mana aku nak jawab final ni. Nasib baik esok exam yang agak mudah iaitu Science Computer!! :D

well, that's a good news for me. but there are certain things that is not understandable and requires time to do so. haih. harap-haraplah esok soalan tu tak banyak keluar. Aminnnnn. 

ramai kawan-kawan aku dari UITM already finished their finals for sem 1. so i am a bit jealous of them and nervous at the same time sebab soalan-soalan UM ni agak susah. 

hurmmmm. wish me for the best guys. takut, gelisah and semacam nak exam sedang overpowering hati aku ni. phuuuuuuuuuiiiiiiiiiihhhh.. susah =..=